Anxious Attachment

Maybe it wasn't you
Maybe it was just
the way your eyes 
meeting mine
rushed blood to my cheeks
burning from the inside out
heart pounding at my chest
desperate to beat its way through 
my sternum
quivering hands 
words stuck
tongue failing to recall
how to move
butterflies irritating 
my stomach lining
moments later words spewing
anxiety crawling out of my mouth
like a swarm of angry, red ants

Maybe it wasn't you
but, the adrenaline
that hit of dopamine
creeping in the veins- a euphoric high
riddled in trauma
craving more of the same cycle
more of that "spark"
an addiction
an affliction of the soul.