I really cared about youAnd I think you knew thatNo, I knew you knew thatI had told you so many timeswith wordswith actionswith the way I looked at youIt was so clearso obviousThe thing wasI could never tell if you cared about meSometimes I thought you dida look in your eyesa kind gesturea corny lineOther... Continue Reading →
Just a little free-write
I feel like I’m always trying so hard to keep it all together. Like a piece of paper with the edges burned...those burns are dark and they run deep. I’m torn and tattered. My heart has been slowly breaking in two for years. It tears apart, slowly and painfully. Each string breaks on its own... Continue Reading →
Rest more, Restless
I feel tired todayMy body begging me to take a breakeyes heavy, limbs gelatinMy brain pushing me to power throughdo this, do thatAn ongoing battle The internal struggle itself, drainingI wonder sometimesWhy we as humans are not allowed to restThe expectation for productivity every dayThe word lazy used as a slur When really we all... Continue Reading →
Expectations
Sometimes I thinkexpectations are little murderers.skulking down dark alley wayswaiting to take our livesThey mentallytear us. Like a knife,slowly moving acrosssoft flesh, bloodpouring in warning, life draining.Expectations openthat wound up-bare-handed andsearch around, graspingintestines and arteries,pulling and tainting untilwe writhe in pain.Sometimes they make it to the brain-little pathogens eating a hole creating a home in... Continue Reading →
Unraveling
I like to think of myself as a spool of yarnthe other person pulls; unraveling me ever soslightly with each small tug. I lose pieces of myselfI grow smaller, weakerAs time wears on the once thick yarn now barelycovers the spool - its foundation poking out between each fine stringThe tugs at the string are... Continue Reading →
Less
I'm not sure if I feel in the same way I used to... I feel, I do But, it's less... LESS raw LESS real....like a perpetual dream Pain feels dimensions awayMaybe because like with anything your body adapts just like your hands your heart calluses over so that it can no longer be rubbed raw... Continue Reading →
The Cave
Walls drip acidic slimerunning down the mirrors that cover every crevice. They reflect and glint offeach other- burning me, blinding me.Voices echo- bellowing: fat, ugly, whale, bitch. I recognize every one, all strangers- passerby’s in the hallways. Those boys twist my brain, bashing and tauntinguntil I believe. My vision morphs: mirrors produce a monster.Eyes narrowed,... Continue Reading →
K.J Stafford 